Just Words
by Delenn
Summary: NEW:42803If Connor's ghostly visit from Darla had gone a little differently, could she have scared him straight? Would the outcome have changed?


**Disclaimer: All characters from 'Angel the Series' don't belong to me, they belong to whoever created/wrote/owns them. And yes, I am too lazy to look up the names of the people who own them, but I can guarantee it's not me. So, don't sue me please!!! The story idea is mine though, so let's not use it without my permission, m'kay?   
  
Author's Notes: Hey everyone! This is just a little Angel story that up and occurred to me overnight (literally), I wonder why so many of them occur at night? Am I that vampire brainsoaked? Yes, I know that's not a word. So, anyway, I decided to write it!   
  
Spoilers: There are some spoilers I suppose, but not many really.   
  
Story Notes: This is short, bittersweet, and hopefully finished. ;) I never can quite tell if I'll finish something or not. There's no pairings. Oh, and when the story refers to "her" or "she" some of them are different people; I just didn't really want to say who was who. Cause, yeah, I think you can figure it out. Darla's POV, right after Connor says all about "good and evil just being words that don't mean anything," and no that's not a direct quote, because you get what line I mean. Italics are something along the line of speaking out loud, but are open for interpretation; bold is first view of Darla before it becomes her POV.   
  
Summary: If Connor's ghostly visit from Darla had gone a little differently, could she have scared him straight? Would the outcome have changed?   
  
Feedback: Yes! Feed the author, please! Critique/Comments/Enjoyment is greatly appreciated, honestly, just drop me a line! Goddess_Delenn@yahoo.com   
  
Distribution: My site, BFW. Everyone else has to ask, all you have to do is click the above link and tell me you want it, I guarantee I'll say yes, you just have to ask first!   
  
Songs For This Fiction: "Don't tell me what to think, because I don't care this time. Don't tell me what to believe because you won't be there. Catch me when I fall…" From 'Going Down In Flames' by Three Doors Down   
  
Warnings: Sex/Language/Violence: undertones/nope/thought about.   
  
Pairing: None   
  
Rating: R for slight mentions of torture.   
  
Date Started/Finished: April 4th, 2003**   
  


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Just Words   
By ~Delenn~

  
  
  
  
**And now she chooses to abandon the sweetness she has been encompassed by thanks to the powers of her untimely visit. They think that she is all peaches and cream after a couple thousand years in hell. They want to believe that one little soul-induced self-sacrifice made up for a death toll up in the high thousands.   
  
For all knowing powers of goodness, they are unwavering in their stupidity.   
  
She stalks over to the crying sickness that she remembers so achingly, the pain that she misses being the cause of. Not her own.**   
  
_There's no good and evil?   
  
Why don't you go get the chains, baby, tie her up, break out the whips. What method would you prefer? I can show you them all; teach you anything. Where to start?_   
  
Little murmurs of denial, he's not going to torture her, not going to kill her. Yes, the words mean nothing but they do to him. Yet she's managed to twist him all up inside, I'd admire her if she weren't messing with what's mine.   
  
And he is mine. Make no mistake.   
  
_Might as well, she's going to die anyway, the methods all come to the same end. Let's have some fun, baby.   
  
You can be just like me, isn't that what you always wanted?_   
  
Not like me, not like me, keep telling yourself that baby, you want to deny your soul, lead the lamb to slaughter? No, there's nothing the same about us.   
  
_No good, no evil just wonderful grayness, can't hate me, can't hate him, if we're all in the middle. If you let her kill this weakling, you're right in there with us.   
  
So, where shall we start? Slice her neck; watch her bleed slowly like a stuck pig, squealing all the while? Better yet, turn her loose, go get the children; they scream louder._   
  
But he's not like that, would never do that, yet he'll still let her. Not that I blame his mutated ideas, I wasn't there to teach him strength, values, to not let anyone near your heart because all it brings is pain. Stuck with fathers who know nothing of the degrading feel of submitting your will night after night, watching your insides twist around until good is bad and bad is good. They don't know anything, but now he knows nothing, my baby.   
  
_I died for you. Are you going to forget that, forget that you owe me?   
  
I was a monster, and I didn't die just to let another monster take my place. If I'd wanted that, I would have let you die and stayed there myself, I'm better at it then you anyway.   
  
Now you turn into me. Well, that's not acceptable, I won't allow it!_   
  
Wavering, little images of pain seeping through that hardened exterior. So young, not able to hide from me, baby, I can see it all. The pain, the suffering, confusion raging inside of you; nobody you can trust.   
  
_You can trust me baby, come lay your head on mother's breast, take comfort in my cold embrace. Just do yourself one favor, don't tilt your neck near my mouth, because I won't let stupidity live.   
  
Feeling weak, confused, on your own? Get used to it, we're all on our own, be strong in the face of it.   
  
Or we could just stop her stupid whining with a knife-_   
  
I'm making him cry with the brutal ugly truth, but she made him cry inside with sugarcoated hateful lies. He'll try to stop me, but there's nothing to stop, I gave myself up for him, remember?   
  
_I love you, do you see? Good, evil, I love you. I wouldn't mind all this if I didn't, now that I'm here to urge you on, but I will not allow you to destroy yourself for the sake of another monster.   
  
If you go bathing in the blood of an innocent, watch out, the blood will bite you back.   
  
At least we'll get to spend some quality mother-son time together, long-term, because you'll be coming to stay with me down there when your time is up. It's fun, if you're used to it. I imagine you'll cry at first, when they skin you alive and spear your organs with hot pokers.   
  
So, why don't you go down this path, I've been there, I get it._   
  
They're just words, keep telling yourself that baby, so long as when she comes in with the knife and I fade out, you let that little girl go on her merry way, so long as you stay pure.   
  
_Oh baby, they're just words, come cry to me, let mommy hush your tears…_   
  


The End


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